~~waitin~~

i hate to wait any longer. u keep on drag it til now. at first u say u will be here around feb. then u say something happen u will be here around march. but now its already march yet u say need to stay there til april due to ur work resign notification thingy! how long more u wan me to wait? u wanna drag til when? i m tired of waitin! i hate to wait! r u tryin to fool me or wat? fuck up!!!!!!!!!!!!! ....... i really don wan to wait......... i m really tired n lonesome...... i don wanna feel insecure n wait any longer..... i don wan...... haiz

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if u promise me will do something, pls do it n show it to me!!! u say u will ask for the organisation at tat time n tell me wat they say, i sms u few hrs after the time u say u will ask them. y u haven reply me??? i don wanna fail this assignment becuz of ur irresponsibility!!! there r other members in this team aso don pull everyone down if u wanna die. u r so dead if i din receive any form of respon from u tonite be4 12.

~~he show up........ again~~

i met him from the internet half year ago i think or maybe longer than tat. he is one of the ideal guy i mentioned be4. though he is not rich or very handsome n hot. but he got he bad boy looks tat i like. i met him twice. first was at the night market. the second time, which happen to kinda touch my heart. its evening tat time, everyone finish work n school n on their way back home. massive traffic jam. i ask him whether he could pick me up n send me home. tat place bac to my home r quite a long distance yet his answer was yes. he send me back. for me, i felt that is hard to get a guy like tat, who will willin to send u home from so far and its traffic jam where we juz met for once.

maybe i m to obsess wit him, i keep on call n sms him. i even question him if he din pick up my call or reply my sms. since then he never spoke to me until recently. i somehow deleted his number cuz i told my self not to remember him anymore though i still wan him tat time. juz few days ago, he sms me. i was kinda familiar wit tat number but i juz couldn't recall whose number was tat. he even told me his name but i still hav no idea. until today, i called him juz now, his voice r so familiar then i realise its him. i ask for more details to make sure he is who i m thinkin. i dono this is a joke or wat, i do miss him even now, i pray to god hoping tat my ideal guy will show up but i never know it will be him. i dono he is my ideal life or not but he is for now.

we send sms to each other a moment, tat time i did told myself not to send anymore sms after i know who he is. juz wait him to do the move. i told myself to hold on my need, urge, delay gratification but i juz cant do it. i ask him for meet up, he then ask whether i m horny or not, he was hoping to suck or hav sex wit me. its not wat i wan, i juz wanna meet him. i do still miss him. this really disappoint me. wat i need is a piece of advise. wat shall i do now? do nothin or give my best shot to get him? i really hope he will be my bf, ideal bf. but i m too scare to be hurt....

~~rude day~~

i m so freakin pissed off now. i wrote quite alot juz now. but this post up cuz the stupid line keep on disconnect. stupid digi ar!!!!!!!!!!!

this morning i call him for something. he answered wit his sleepy voice. after he hang u the call. alot thing came across my mind. in was wonderin i m so bad to him ever since break wit him is becuz i m tryin to avoid him, forget him, convince myself tat its his fault to dumb me or its juz that i m jealous n bad but non other reasons? i do really miss his voice, the way he touch me espcially at the furniture shop, everything he did. feel so lonesome n my tears almost slip by writing this. even though there r couple of guy try to woo me, but i juz feel everythin come too fast n so insecure. i really don wanna get hurt. i rather i m the bad guy to hurt someone.erm....

anyway, went to class today, suprisingly no one sit wit beside me. the entire was onli me, i dono its becuz the way i wore clothes or the "negative energy" sending out from me. even the late comer don wan sit wit me but not those who late more than 30min cuz the class was full except my place at tat time.

after the class i went to look for my lecturer(franklin) to ask some questions on my assignment but he is not there, damn it. then i go for another lecturer (justin) and he say he dono anything. thats funny huh, in the class, franklin said we can ask justin if we don understand but he knows NOTHING!! greatt. anyway, justin is way way way so hot n cute. he got dimples n nice firm ass. i was crazy about him wit my fren (girl). when i was in his office askin questio juz now, all of the sudden i feel like wanna jump toward him to kiss n hug him!!! fuck!! wat m i thinkin?? i even wanna tell him i like him n hope he will somehow like me too XD. keep on look at him in his office. wow~~ shows tat i m so crazy.

the assignment i mention its a group assignment. i feel so unfortunate to be the leader. the members is almost like useless. they don seems like care n give a damn about this assignment. my first plan was sit there, act stupid, be quiet so tat i don hav to do so much. i hav no idea i will be assign to such group. dying soon i think =.= now i juz wish they can move their butt n do their part onli =.=

when i reach kl central, i m lookin for the touch n' go department to ask something, when i ask direction for the touch n' go department location, tat lady gave me a lousy, tone and facial expression. as if i killed his husband or something else. she is shit!! juz a shit. something happen when i was in the touch n' go department. she giving me those shit face. i dono its becuz i din take the number n que(i did look around to see where is the machine or whether there is such system i onli realise it after i solve my problem) or the way i dress. =.=

lastly, i juz pray to god wish tat my deisire guy will show up n come to me, my assignment will complete be4 the due date will a gud mark n hope tat my wounds isn't a big problems n will heal up soon. tq~

~~ movie time~~

huhu~~~ juz watch alice in the wonderland. the movie was ok but juz the seats. i have no idea wat gets into their head, if there r no more gud seat then just don wan watch the movie. they bought the second row away from the screen. lucky my nect din break. =.=

the next coming up movie i wanna watch r "the last air bender" and "dragon"

basically tats about it. my parent went to australia for few days, so no one will bring me to kl central take bus to class. =.= damn it, have to wake up early to wait bus at home adi. haiz~~

~~ brain burst~~

wow~~~ after a week of exam, hehe actually juz 3 days exam.

the first was mass comm then biopsychology n motivation the leadership skill

all last minute study~~ but lucky i m give a fast learning skill, i think can get through the test easily. hehe~~

learn really quite alot of things today, cuz i almost swollow half of the leadership book today. stuffin all 230+ pages in to my head within 5 hrs
tons of info~~~ wow~~ suppose need to cover 7 chapter but i juz read til 6 onli. =.=

then now i hav to start wit my assignment, omg, its due date is on this friday. hopefully i can crap all the best n pass it up. but hope the marks wont be crap too~~ XD

hmm~~ follow by another 2 assignment need to pass up on 22nd. but i don wan to do~~~ i wan go shoppin~~~ watch movie~~~ how????? lazy ar~~~~who can help me~~??

yeah~~ tats about it~~ finish crappin here adi~~ my balls kinda itchy~~ nope it heals soon~~ XD