pain trigger

he called juz now but i avoided i sms n asked wat he wan be4 i sms him i was wonderin shall i sms him i knew he would hav juz about my condition but i dono y i was hoping though i know was the most least possible thing to happen yet i still hope tat he call is becuz wanna be together with me again juz as i aspected he call to ask about my condition onli then i replied y would he wanna care since he threw me away tat day? there is no more reply from him.... i was blaming him for not contact me but he did now... i m so angry, sad n lost now... i m so confuse with all this mix feeling. i m so angry tat he break wit me n dum me when the time i needed him the most i m sad that i build this relation wit the wrong person i m lost that my last support is gone n i dono i can survive alone in this path... i cant stop think about the past memory n the things might happen IF we din break.. IF.... such a sad word.....